FAMILY EDITION
DATE NIGHT THE FREELANCE PARENT With the season of love upon us, shiny new columnist Cat Hufton tackles the challenge of balancing childcare while making time for romance
M y husband and I went out for dinner last week, and it made me realise how little I look at his face when I’m speaking to him. I’m ashamed to say, I forgot how handsome he is. Very distracted by our two energetic boys, we usually talk while changing a nappy, cleaning Weetabix off the floor, or trying to wrangle our toddler into the pram. Even when the kids are in bed, we chat while sitting side by side on the sofa. It’s true that small children leave very little time or energy for grand gestures of love or connection. So, we’re trying to make more of a concerted effort to go on date nights. My sons are now aged five and two, but in the first year of their lives, I was mostly breastfeeding and worrying. This meant going out together felt like a monumental task, which took a lot of organising and stress. Our own relationship – like many others – had to be put on the back burner while we got through the sleepless nights and sheer exhaustion. Now that we’re out of that phase, it feels nice to get dressed up and head out to a restaurant occasionally. I’ll admit that placing trust in other people with my children does not come easily, but we’re fortunate to have a willing aunty at our disposal and grandparental help from time to time. When babysitters
Friends of mine recently went on a kayaking lesson together; they reported it made for good, wholesome fun. It brought back memories of when my spouse and I went to a hot yoga class and were told off by the instructor for bickering at the back.
Perhaps sporting activities are not a date we’ll personally repeat, but you get the gist. Suffice to say, it doesn’t matter what you do; just that you are making time for one another away from the stresses of
It feels nice to dress up and head out to a restaurant
prove unavailable, one of my favourite things to do is book a morning off together when the kids are at school and nursery. We haven’t done this often, but when
Cat Hufton is a freelance journalist and creator of The Freelance Parent, a weekly newsletter dedicated to thriving professionally and personally post-procreation. You can find her on Substack at cathufton.substack.com and follow her on X @CatHufton About Cat
family life. It’s always good to be reminded about why you chose to jump on this crazy train together – and look each other in the eyes occasionally. On days when none of this is possible, simply sending a text with the message, ‘I love you’ makes a nice change from ‘can you grab milk?’.
we have it’s been lovely. It also means you don’t have the added cost or worry of paying for a babysitter. Grabbing some lunch, heading to an exhibition or even making a morning cinema screening helps to break the routine and shake things up. And it feels a little bit like bunking off, which is fun.
CAMBSEDITION.CO.UK FEBRUARY 2024 51
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